Big Trouble/Bigger Trouble
(2000/2005, Fading Captain Series)
In
2000, the Fading Captain Series released an LP entitled Big
Trouble by Hazzard Hotrods. It came on pink vinyl, was
limited to 500, and sold out almost immediately, into Pollard collector obscurity.
In
2005, for better or worse, the LP was reissued on CD only, this time with 25 more minutes of music over the course of 7 unearthed tracks. The CD was entitled Bigger
Trouble. The story behind this madness goes like
this; Pollard and the gang made up a bunch of songs on the spot
and record them with a boom-box or what not. All of the songs
were supposedly recorded in a video store credited as MC Video, hence
the good amount of song titles with movie names.
Honestly,
most of, if not all of this is pretty damn unlistenable, and pretty confounding. Below, actors who stared in the movies are
listed because who cares?
Side A:
A
Farewell to Arms- Same
song originally released on the first Suitcase collection. Reviewed there. Directed by Charles Vidor, starring Rock
Hudson.
The
Lawless ‘90s- 2 Rough,
mid-tempo, poppier tune. Somewhere between ZZ Top guitar lead, and
‘60s jangle rhythm.
39
Steps- 2 Slower
chug, builds up into rambling riff rock with desperate
repetitive screaming by Pollard. Directed by Alfred Hitchcock,
starring Robert Donat.
Tit
for Tat- 2 Bass
driven rock song with desperate Pollard repetitive yelps and gargles.
Directed by Charley Rogers, starring Stan Laurel and Oliver Hardy.
Sabotage- 2 No Beastie Boys here, although Pollard did beat them in a pick-up
game of basketball at Lollapalooza (or so the story goes). Slightly
shorter version than the same version that was later released on Suitcase.
Directed by Alfred Hitchcock, starring Sylvia Sidney.
SIDE B:
Big
Trouble- 2 Same
version as the song on Suitcase,
but nearly 3 minutes shorter. Directed by John Cassavetes,
starring Peter Falk.
Runaway- 3 One
of the most GBV sounding songs on the LP. Light lead guitar
over melodic bass line, with mumbling Pollard. Most nostalgic
feeling of the batch.
Get
Dirty- 1 Put
on your shit-kickers and “get dirty” with the boys. Stomp
the floor, smash a mug, spit ‘bacco juice in a jug.
Clue- 1
Really
boring, drawn out lounge song with distorted Pollard vocal crunch speak-singing. Directed by Jonathan Lynn, starring Tim Curry.
Solid
Gold- 2
Quiet,
lightly strummed easy listening no-fi. Complete with the lyrics
“I didn’t need a beer, I thought that you were here,” and
rhythmic Pollard coughing! Poetry is easy to master, kids.
CD ONLY BONUS TRACKS:
A
Walk in the Sun- 2 Repetitive,
cock rocker with a rather punk bassline. Directed by Lewis Milestone,
starring Lloyd Bridges.
The
Man Who Knew Too Much- 2
Slow,
jangled jam alla Galaxie 500 (or just alla complete on-the spot
nonsense). Directed by Alfred Hitchcock, starring
Peter Lorre (in 1934), and James Stewart (in 1956).
A
Star is Born- 2 Mid-tempo,
post-punk, with semi-melodic vocal improvisation. Perfect for gazing upon the gray skies on a crummy day. Directed
by George Cukor, starring Judy Garland.
Tell
Me Why-
2 Pretty
GBV sounding, if it weren’t over 6 GD minutes! Decent jangly
riff, and melodic bassline, but it just don’t end. Make it stop.
Rat
Infested Motels of Dayton
- 1 Unfortunately,
this is not named after a Frank Zappa film 200 Motels. It is, however, only 9 seconds
long. 9. seconds. Guitar plays, Pollard talks with a weird accent. Over.
Shit. What?
Really
Gonna Love Me Now- 1 Fast,
punk bass line carries the tune with bashing drums. Guitars either
don’t do much, do anything, or play out of tune crap over it. Pollard just repeats the title and bunch of time, sounding like
a blind guy lost in a razor factory, while having a stroke.
We
Want Miles (of Land)-
1 Slightly
GBV sounding jam, that’s slightly off-kilter. Unfortunately, too
long and dull.
You didnt actually rate farewell to arms here or in the suitcase review
ReplyDeleteI like the part in "Clue" where he sings "C! L! U! E! Find out what it means to me!"
ReplyDeleteHey, the Suitcase review refers the review of "A Farewell to Arms" to the Hazzard Hotrods.
ReplyDeleteAnd I just noticed Lucas Gelati pointed this out 3 months ago.
ReplyDeleteA Farewell to Arms says it is reviewed on the Suitcase and page, but on the Suitcase page it says it is reviewed here. A shame because it is the only good song on this wretched album.
ReplyDelete